Generosity

I just have to brag a little on my two sweet girls.  They both have such incredibly generous hearts. 

Today in the pre-op room we were saying goodbye to Mary, and I gave her a long hug, and she said, “I’ll be okay, Mama.” – comforting ME.  Then in post-op, when she was still too groggy to talk, she took note of a baby in another cubicle who was crying loudly and pitifully, and she looked at me, inclined her head toward the baby, and stuck her bottom lip out sympathetically. 

Then, after we got home and Mary was lying miserably in her bed, Leah sat with her and rubbed her back for a long time.  Then, while discussing how we would handle things through the night, Leah said, “Just wake me up if you need anything.”  Now, Mary is reading in bed, and Leah is sitting in there with her reading a magazine, keeping her company, and running and fetching for her.  All of this without being asked. 

I’ve spent some time over the last week or so thinking about how selfish I am about so many little things, even just in my head, and trying to do better about it.  And I look at my sweet girls and wonder where they got their incredibly generous spirits.  I don’t think it’s something we’ve necessarily taught them, consciously or otherwise, and I think it must just be a straight-up gift from God. If anything, they are teaching me. 

So, tonight, as we all recover from a long day, and look forward hopefully to better times, I am grateful for my girls and their sweet hearts.  I am grateful to God for several answered prayers today.  And I am humbled, awed, and somewhat chastened by the generosity of the spirits of these two teenage girls.

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Top Ten Ways To Get Kicked Out Of Cici’s

I took the girls to Cici’s the other day for lunch, and somehow, the subject of ways to get kicked out came up.  So – sharing full and equal credit for authorship with Mary and Leah – here’s what we came up with.

10. Go down the buffet line sticking your head under the sneeze guard and sniffing all the pizzas. Touch them all with one finger, for good measure.

9.  Order some weird combination of ingredients on a pizza that nobody else would ever eat – like jalapenos, macaroni, and carrots – then don’t eat it.

8. Buy a bouncy ball from the vending machine, then complain to the manager that it’s not a gumball.

7. Ask for the icing bottle (for the cinnamon rolls) and, a la Walter Cunningham, drown everything on your plate.  (“What in the Sam Hill are you doing?!”)

6.  Fill up your water cup with marinara and then ask for another one for the alfredo.

5. Ask the cashier if you can exchange the plastic necklace you won in the game room.

4. Start a food fight.

3. Pile up a couple of plates with cucumbers and ranch dressing from the salad bar, then put up a sign at your table that you’re giving free facials.

2. Take all the napkins out of the dispenser (now that they are in one big container on the buffet line instead of at your table).  You can use them to help with the facials.

And the Number 1 way to get kicked out of Cici’s:

1. Before an employee can say, “Thanks for coming in!” to someone who is leaving, yell, “Bye! Hope you don’t get food poisoning!”

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Denton ISD – You Rock!

I would like to give shout-outs to some very special, wonderful people: the teachers, counselors, and administration of Denton ISD.

My older daughter, Mary, has been struggling with illness for the last two or three months. She missed a bunch of school, and eventually we had to put her on homebound education.  By the grace of God, and with the help of these wonderful people, and with sheer grit and determination, Mary has completely finished all of the school work needed to complete this school year.  I want to publicly recognize some people:

First and foremost, her teachers:
Shanna Hardesty
Karen Reidy
Stephanie Garcia
Loretta McDonald
Cindy Hess
Shannon Campbell
Christi Spindle

These talented educators went waaaaay out of their ways to help Mary with the goal of completing this year without having to repeat anything. They worked with her individually, talked to her on the phone, and showed amazing flexibility while still staying true to the goal of educating. I am incredibly grateful to them.

Mary’s homebound teacher, Maria Harris, and the DISD homebound coordinator, Barb Haflich, were unfailingly kind, and helped us navigate the homebound process with compassion and skill.

Angela Tate, attendance…guru?… was also very compassionate and willing to go the extra mile for Mary.

Nicole Dampman, guidance counselor, was likewise wonderful. She helped us shape the goals for Mary’s school work, while at the same time insisting that Mary’s health was the most important priority. Plus, she has bobbleheads of all the Big Bang Theory characters in her office, which I find utterly awesome!

While I’m on the subject, I also want to give a quick shout-out to the nice folks at TWU who helped me navigate dual credit issues. Especially one Corey Green, who made me cry when he told me, so kindly, “I don’t want you to stress about this, okay?”

So, to all these folks, and any others behind the scenes, Mary and her dad and I thank you. We could not be more pleased to be in this school district, filled with folks who truly want to see kids succeed, even (maybe especially) when they have difficulties that have nothing to do with their intellect. You are a blessing to us.

God bless you all abundantly.

 

 

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Randomness

It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything.  I usually wait until I “feel a blog entry coming on.”  But I think I’ll take a page out of my buddy WFHMom‘s book and just write about some random stuff.  I’m not going to do the 40-day thing WFHMom is doing.  Just a today thing.

1.  I love my kids.  Not just they-are-my-kids-so-I-have-to-love-them love.  Not just I-am-their-mother-and-I-will-always-love-them love. I ENJOY them!  They are 14 and 16 now, both girls.  I keep hearing about how hard it is to raise teenagers, especially girls. They definitely have their moments of drama; they push each other’s  buttons regularly; I have to fuss at them sometimes.  But for the most part, I am having so much fun with them.  They are funny, smart and clever, and they make me laugh — like, belly-laugh — all the time. They are great kids, and I’m not the only one who thinks so!

2. I hate politics and politicians. I have absolutely no faith in any of them, on either side of the aisle.  Don’t know what to do about that.  Just putting it out there. (Oh, and please refrain from starting a flame war over this. That’s part of what I hate. Thanks.)

3. To quote one of my kids when she was little, “Sugar…is yummy.”

4. I enjoy piano music… pretty much any format: Elton John, Billy Joel, Barry Manilow, Tchaikovsky, Rachmaninoff, Jim Brickman, Doobie Brothers (see: China Grove), etc.  If it’s acoustic piano, I’m more than likely going to enjoy it.  My mom has played piano for as long as I can remember, and that may be why it’s pretty much my favorite instrument. Just recently saw this on youtube, well worth the time.

5. Seems like every time I get attached to a certain brand of something, it gets discontinued.  I mean, it happens a lot.  Lotion, bread, cheese, makeup, you name it.  It’s annoying.

6. I spilled Diet Coke on my keyboard AND mouse yesterday.  Both went berserk.  On my husband’s advice, I took them outside and hosed them down, letting them dry in the sun.  The mouse seems like it is going to be okay.  The keyboard is toast.  I plugged it back in this morning and it immediately started typing returns, for 12 pages, before I got it to unstick.  If you press the space bar, it types 8’s.  The backspace button types plus signs.  David said it needs to dry more.  I don’t have time for it to dry more.  Fortunately, I was able to replace it fairly cheaply. (Chapter 2 of that little saga is, I also spilled some water on my desk a few hours later. I have outlawed uncovered drinks at my desk. I am apparently like a toddler in this area.)

7. Okay, that reminds me of a story about my sister.  Near the end of her life, she was a bit of a spiller.  Her husband had extended the kids’ rule of “nothing but water outside the kitchen” to her.  So, one day, I was there with her, and someone had brought over some crazy big, crazy delicious chocolate chip cookies.  She wanted to eat one, and she wanted to eat it in the den on the couch.  So, I sat down with her and held a napkin under her chin while she munched with great satisfaction.  She had eaten about a third of it when I heard the garage door open.  I told her we were busted.  Without a single word, she carefully and completely crammed the whole rest of the cookie into her mouth. No evidence, no crime.  My sister, ladies and gentlemen!

8. Our kitty cat was so happy to see us when we got back from Memphis earlier this week that she decided to forego the usual punishing-us-for-leaving-her phase of the return and went straight to I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I’M SO GLAD TO BE HOME PURRRRRRRR.

9.  What is the past tense of “forego”?  Is it “forewent”?

10. I just looked it up, it IS “forewent.” That’s weird.

Have a lovely evening. Thanks for tuning in.

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Sisters – The Next Generation

I’ve talked a lot about my sister Mary, and what our relationship was like early on, then as adults.  She was an incredible person, and my relationship with her, and the way I lost her way too early, was a lesson to me in how important our siblings are.  Especially sisters.

Well, now I want to talk about my two daughters, sisters of the next generation.  My older daughter is named Mary, for my sister.  My younger daughter is Leah.  They are 16 and 14, respectively.

Yesterday, after a couple of days of serious pain, Mary was diagnosed with kidney stones. She’s going to be all right, but is facing a few tough days.

Yesterday morning, she was hurting badly and waiting for me to come home to take her to the doctor.  Leah was getting ready for school, and she had Mary come lie down in her, Leah’s, bed so Leah could keep her distracted.

Today, after a long day of waiting for doctors and pharmacies to get their acts together, Mary was lying on the couch, hurting badly.  I gave her a pain pill and sat with her for a while, telling stories to distract her.  Then I needed to go take care of some things (like letting the family know the latest news), and Leah came in and sat with her – without being asked – and talked and laughed with her, keeping her company and keeping her occupied while we waited for the pain to abate.

My two girls most definitely have their moments of being at each others’ throats.  They know how to push each others’ buttons, and do so regularly.  That IS what sisters do, especially teenage sisters (though they’ve been doing it since birth).  But those two girls love each other deeply, and know the value of having each other as sisters.

I especially want to give Leah a shout-out, because Mary is getting the lion’s share of attention right now, and Leah not only does not resent it, but is actively helping take care of Mary.  She is being so incredibly sweet, and I’m so incredibly proud of her.

Sisters have a special bond that is difficult to explain to men.  Sometimes there is simply no one else who will do.  There are exceptions, of course, and that is sad.  But I was blessed to have that special bond with my sister Mary.  Knowing that my two girls have it, too, gives me a lot of joy.

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Christmas Music 2.0

I wrote a blog entry a year or two ago (I would check exactly, but am too lazy) about my thoughts on Christmas music.

Here are some new thoughts.

First, I figured out that I like some Christmas music a lot.  I like some Christmas music well enough to tolerate it.  And some Christmas music I positively can’t stand.

Guess what?  I feel that way about MOST music!  That epiphany has helped me a lot  this Christmas season, because it means I can listen to Christmas music on the radio the way I usually listen to the radio.  When it’s something I like, I turn it up.  When it’s something I like well enough, I leave it be.  If I hate it, I change the station.  Simple.  Just like always!

New favorites:

Let it Snow by Chicago
Little Drummer Boy by Pentatonix (In fact, I discovered I like this song, period.  I love the end where it says, “Then he smiled at me!”  What a wonderful picture!)

Old favorites:

All I Want for Christmas Is You – Vince Vance & the Valiants
All I Want for Christmas Is You – Mariah Carey
Sleigh Ride – instrumental version by Boston Pops Orchestra
Traditional versions of Silent Night, O Holy Night, Hark the Herald Angels Sing, O Come All Ye Faithful, and Joy to the World.
Mary, Did You Know? (Kenny Rogers & Wynona Judd)
A Baby Changes Everything – Faith Hill
Charlie Brown Christmas

Songs I tolerate:

Holly Jolly Christmas
Blue Christmas
White Christmas
Please Come Home for Christmas (Don Henley) (do you sense a theme here?)

Songs that impel me to change the station:
Feliz Navidad
Any version of Jingle Bells, Santa Claus is Coming to Town, Santa Baby, I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus, or Frosty the Snowman.
Anything by Amy Grant

In other good news this year, I am doing pretty well this Christmas.  If you’ve followed my blog, you know that this is usually a difficult time of year for me.  I won’t say I’m doing as well as last Christmas, but I’m not in any kind of deep funk, either.  On balance, things are good.  It’s been a stressful couple of months around here, for many reasons, but we’ve also had more than our share of blessing, too.

So, Merry Christmas, everyone!  Thanks for following me, and thanks for being so awesome.

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The Songs She CAN Sing

My mother and I both learned sign language about 40 years ago, helping interpret church services. My mother advanced far ahead of me in skill, and could still interpret an entire church service now, were she strong enough.  I can get through a rudimentary conversation, enough to get by.  My daughter Mary is taking ASL (American Sign Language) in school as her foreign language, and she is outstripping me, too, in her skills.

Recently, a deaf woman my mother and I knew in Waco, Patsy Hoffman, passed away.  My mother (a multi-talented, multi-faceted woman) also wrote (and still writes, occasionally) for the Waco Tribune Herald.  Many years ago, Mom wrote a column about the deaf during “Deaf Awareness Week.”  Here is an excerpt:

The deaf I know give and receive comfort and reassurance with a most touching simplicity.  My husband and I visited our deaf friend Patsy Hoffman and prayed with her one day shortly before she was to have surgery.  In her Demerol haze, she sat up and held out her arms to be hugged, like a child.

Patsy reciprocated with a visit to me sometime later when I was recovering from surgery…. “I act pretty good,” I confessed, “but inside I feel like a big baby.”  She kissed my cheek, quietly signed “I love you,” and left….

The deaf sign for "I love you"   Staff Graphic - Phil Atteberry, Waco Tribune Herald, 9-28-85

The deaf sign for “I love you” Staff Graphic – Phil Atteberry, Waco Tribune Herald, 9-28-85

In worship services, I sometimes sense that Patsy would love to sing – really sing with her voice.  When conditions are just right – the songs are slow enough, or possibly familiar enough – she will follow not only my signs but also will form the words with her own lips as I do with mine.

Once as I was practicing at home I was smitten with the relevance of one song:

“There is music in my soul today,
A carol to my King,
And Jesus, listening, can hear
The songs I cannot sing.”

Privately, I fantasize that Jesus, listening, can hear the songs that Patsy cannot sing.

- Jeanie Mercer, Waco Tribune Herald, 9-28-85

As I was trying to tell my kids about Patsy this week, after hearing that she had passed away, I was struck with my own memories of how she would sometimes strain with the effort and desire to sing the songs she was signing.

Now she can.

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